Don’t be a Rolfe

If you understand the reference before I explain, you are one of us. And by ‘us’ I mean the ones who shake their heads every morning at the frivolity of this current situation.

What is a Rolfe? A Rolfe is a person who is exploited by the men upstairs, a person who is the bottom-feeder yes-man. They strive to win points by ‘following orders’ and turning on even those whom they once considered friends or family.

Yes, Rolfe was that delightful little Austrian turned Nazi in the Sound of Music.

“Fuck off Liesl, I’m a Nazi now.”

Yup. The guy who was 17 going on 18, professing his love for the doe-eyed Liesl, was handed a uniform and it was over.

I went into town today, for the first time since this Covid-19 fauxdemic started, not because I adore compliance, but because I am a natural recluse, and I don’t want to see idiots wearing masks. Besides, my partner does all the grocery shopping. I work from home and there’s nowhere to go anyway, so I prefer to stay home. I live in a big European city. I’m used to seeing town packed with people, from locals doing their shopping to tourists going on the piss.

I mean, it was bad energy right away. Everyone is walking around in masks like good little citizens. Their zombie Valium eyes shooting darts at my maskless face, because wearing a mask is suffocating for me. Detremental to my physical and emotional health.

However, I was more or less prepared for the people wearing masks.

Okay, maybe not that prepared.

But what really irritates me are the people in shops. The low-level, once drudges of society, mostly security guards, acting like, quite frankly….cunts. I mean, when you’re standing in a queue, you can see the maniacal gleam of joy in their eyes. They are the anointed ones now. The ones who decide who goes in the shop. With their hands up in your face (so much for social distancing) they dictate when you are allowed in. Even when, clearly, a whole bunch of people just filed out of the store.

My partner and I went to Burger King to get lunch. Yeah, it’s garbage food. But we were hungry and that’s all that was open. We go in and order. There are signs everywhere reminding you to keep your distance. Follow the arrows. Stand behind this line. And there were chairs lined up against the counter for extra distancing, never mind that there is already a plexiglass wall protecting them from us. The woman taking our order is a sour Eastern European woman, who is probably one cocktail away from hanging herself after her shift.

There weren’t that many people inside. But I don’t know the new world order rules. We didn’t have a number for them to call out when our order was ready. So my partner went back up to the counter and asked. For Christ’s sake…you would have thought he asked the manager, another severe Eastern European woman, to take her top off and show him her tits.

‘What number?! No numbers here! Look around, this place is empty! We’ll tell you when it’s ready!’

He sheepishly walks back to me. I shrug. And to make it extra exciting, the security guard walks up to us ready to pounce. It was his big time to shine. I mean, really, these people are living for this.

Eh, yeah, there is a disturbance in Burger King. Some asshole is asking about his order.’

But there was some good news for those of us who aren’t fooled by this charade, there was a protest in London’s Hyde Park today. Sadly, the news is painting them as selfish, idiotic bastards that don’t care about the elderly.

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